12.22.2011

It's alright.

I'm convinced.
I'm convinced that there is a consequence for every decision.
And I'm convinced that there are two types of decisions.
1. The decision to follow what you know to be true.
2. The decision to go against everything you feel is right.

Usual results for the first:
Growing experiences.
Blessings.
Comfort.
Peace.
Grow closer to God.

Usual results for the second:
Growing experiences.
Trials.
Heartache.
Confusion.
Step away from God.

Here's where I get honest and open about private things, in a nonchalant and vague way. It's a thrilling talent I possess. Hardly.

I specifically remember a moment on the eighth of November, where I drove up to that special place of mine, and I cried a little. I cried because I knew what to do, and I didn't like it.
You know what I did? I did exactly the opposite of what I knew I needed to.
I can honestly say I have done this a few times in the past, and it never ended well.
But within a day, I couldn't have cared less about what I knew I should do.
I'd been following what I "knew" I needed to do for the last 20 years, why not step out on a limb and live a little? So I did.
You can guess what I'm about to say next.
It was a bad idea. I should've walked away when I knew it was the right decision to, and I should've listened to all the people on the outside looking in. I was warned by a few, and nothing mattered except this one thing. How could it be so bad? It was a small thing, and it wasn't like there was any other option...so I took a leap.
The view wasn't so great. Neither was the landing.
After I've had some time to clear my head and get my mind off things, the whole experience wasn't necessarily a bad thing.
I learned at least one valuable lesson.
Always listen to that first impression.
Believe me, I will.

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