As I've said before, sometimes I write just so I can capture my emotions of the day.
Don't try to really understand this, because you'd have to know, to know. Ya know?
Just had a lot on my mind all the time.
too much shopping to do. 3 weeks from today. a week from sunday. last saturday. prepare talk. read a hundred pamphlets. listen to the language of my people. alphabet looks like spam emails. immunizations make my jugular hurt. is that normal? I wish I would've been more awake. scratch that. too fun. get through this week. don't want time to go fast. can I just go already. why can't I wrap my head around this thing. letters from friends make me hurt. my favorite makes me cry too often. Take showers when you're sad. and bring popsicles to the shower party. too relaxing. keep thinking about change. no one's going to be the same when I get back. don't complain about me leaving. I'm leaving everyone I know. Am I happy that it won't be hot? Will I even be safe there. in denial about goodbyes. so stoked to be in the mtc. can't wait to have mission friends. excited to see matt and phil daily. the temple is too good for words. highly recommend it to anyone who's ready. gonna miss music. looking forward to my long coat. I'm never hungry anymore. Is that a problem? i'm in like. my nerves won't calm down. I'm chopping my hair. farewell to long hair, finally. letters will probably get me through this. my room is a disaster area. overwhelmed with sentiments. canteen. get $1 tip from same old man daily. love 'almond guy'. feel weird around everyone. people treat me like I have cancer. too many photo shoots left. not enough time to edit. not enough motivation, either. shouldn't have got a pinterest. I miss friends from hs. only 5 more shifts at day job. psyched to be done stirring yogurt. can't wait to wear a name tag. bilingual in 1.5 years. love my frumperstilskin outfits. chunky shoes, I will rock you. noni bought me boots. so cute. laser tagging. i'm gonna miss jamba juice. and cafe rio. of course.
phew. if you read that and understood any of it. you best leave a comment, lovers.